Married!

Posted on April 3, 2011 by Colin

Liz and I have tied the knot! April 2, 2011 was the best day of my life! I was surrounded by family and close friends for the greatest celebrations of love.

You are the love of my life, Liz!

 

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The Things Spambots Blast

Posted on January 6, 2011 by Colin

I don’t get much in the way of traffic on my blog’s comments, but always have good ‘ol Akismet kicking up lots of spam for me. Normally, it’s your usual, run-of-the-mill, easily-identifiable sex references, but occasionally it’s kind of mean. Case in point:

I used to love reading your blog, but lately it’s been a little boring. I’ll still read it though =)

That’s harsh, spam robot! I’ve just started up blogging again and here you go knocking down my self-esteem. I suppose my blog was more original and interesting for the months upon months that I left it dormant. Now that I’m wasting your time spewing my thoughts into it, it’s a little hard to take, right? Sorry ’bout that.

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A Way to Fix the NFL Playoffs

Posted on January 3, 2011 by Colin

NFL LogoThere’s a lot of talk… err… complaining about the NFL Playoffs. This is mostly because there are a lot of teams with better records than their first-round opponents that will be at a home field disadvantage in the first round, and mostly because there’s one team — the Seattle Seahawks — who will be hosting a playoff game after a season with a losing record of 7-9.

So here goes.. let’s fix this! But fear not — we won’t get too drastic.

NFC LogoTo get us started, let’s go over the NFC final standings and playoff seatings, according to current NFL rules:

  1. Atlanta Falcons (13-3, winners of NFC South)
  2. Chicago Bears (11-5, winners of NFC North)
  3. Philadelphia Eagles (10-6, winners of NFC East)
  4. Seattle Seahawks (7-9, winners of NFC West)
  5. New Orleans Saints (11-5, wildcard from NFC South)
  6. Green Bay Packers (10-6, wildcard from NFC North)

Now, it’s worth mentioning that two teams finished with records better than the Seahawks, but did not qualify for the playoffs by virtue of not winning their division. Those unfortunate teams are:

Now, it’s unfortunate that a 7-9 Seahawks team gets in ahead of those teams, but there’s no way a team that wins their division shouldn’t get into the playoffs. So, yes, the Seahawks play in a crappy division and the Giants and Bucs play in considerably difficult divisions, but that’s the way it goes. You win your division, you get in. And you should.

The problem is that those very same 7-9 Seahawks are actually going to host the far-better-performing 11-5 Saints in the Wildcard weekend, when — had the Saints been in any other division, they’d be waiting at home with a first round bye this coming weekend. That’s a tough break for the Saints.

Here’s the thing — if you want a bye, you should have to win your division. Plain and simple. There has to be a prize for winning your division and there has to be a punishment for failing to do so.

BUT, in the Wildcard weekend, all (okay, most) bets should be off. The Saints should be hosting a game, just by virtue of having the best record among the four teams playing in Wildcard weekend.

So here’s my plan for re-doing the playoff seating:

  1. The four division winners are in the playoffs. Your prize for winning a division, even if you do it as crappily as the Seahawks, is that you get to play in the playoffs. This is the same as currently.
  2. The next best two teams also get in the playoffs. They didn’t win their divisions, but they’re freaking good enough to play for a championship. This is also the same as currently.
  3. The best two division winners have first-round byes. Settle this with the usual tie-breakers. This would actually keep this year’s NFC picture the same as it is, now. Atlanta and Chicago would stay warm and healthy by the fire for the first week of the playoffs. This rule is the same as present. No major changes, yet.
  4. To decide the order of the wildcard teams, go by best record, don’t initially take division crowns into consideration. This would change the order of the wildcard teams to New Orleans, Green Bay, Philadelphia, Seattle. That’s almost a flip-flop. The games would be the same, but the home teams would change.
  5. But! If there is a tie in determining the wildcard seating, use division championship as the first tie-breaker. This would mean that though Green Bay and Philadelphia have the same record, and Green Bay has the head-to-head advantage over the Eagles, the Eagles would be seated ahead of the Packers by virtue of winning their division.

Now, under these rules, we’d see a fairly close seating to what we have, now, but there wouldn’t be gross favoritism for division-winning wildcards, only moderate favoritism. If you think about it, a 10-6 Eagles team that was beat in week 1 by a 10-6 Packers team, but was able to win their division when the Packers couldn’t, should get home field in that matchup. However, a 7-9 Seahawks team should just be happy to be in the playoffs, and they haven’t earned a home playoff game over an 11-5 Saints team that had to battle through a division that could’ve easily produced three playoff teams.

So, NFL Competition Committee, I hope you’re listening. Here’s how the NFC Playoff Standings would shake-down under these new, adjusted rules:

  1. Atlanta Falcons (13-3, NFC South Champs, Best Conference Record)
  2. Chicago Bears (11-5, NFC North Champs, First Round Bye)
  3. New Orleans Saints (11-5, 2nd Place NFC South, Best Wildcard Round Record, Home Team for Wildcard Round)
  4. Philadelphia Eagles (10-6, NFC East Champs, Home Team for Wildcard Round)
  5. Green Bay Packers (10-6, 2nd Place NFC North, Visit Philadelphia in Wildcard Round)
  6. Seattle Seahawks (7-9, NFC West Champs, Visit New Orleans in Wildcard Round)

That’s a lot more stomach-able, yes!? It just makes sense. We shouldn’t toss the Seahawks out altogether, because winning your division counts for something, but at 7-9, shouldn’t they just be happy to be in the tournament? And under this, the best team in the wildcard round gets a home game. You’re welcome, New Orleans Saints.

AFC LogoIf you’re curious, here’s how this would impact the AFC. The AFC breaks down like this under current NFL rules:

  1. New England Patriots (14-2, AFC East Champs, Best Overall Record)
  2. Pittsburgh Steelers (12-4, AFC North Champs, First Round Bye)
  3. Indianapolis Colts (10-6, AFC South Champs, Home Wildcard Game)
  4. Kansas City Chiefs (10-6, AFC West Champs, Home Wildcard Game)
  5. Baltimore Ravens (12-4, 2nd Place AFC North, Road Wildcard Game)
  6. NY Jets (11-5, 2nd Place AFC East, Road Wildcard Game)

Let’s ignore that the Colts are somehow in the AFC South for a second and look at this. The Colts and Chiefs both have worse records than the teams they’ll host in the wildcard round. Both of them! The Pats and Steelers took care of business, sure, but the Ravens and Jets are getting screwed, here. Under our new seating rules, you’d get this:

  1. New England Patriots (14-2, AFC East Champs, Home Field Advantage)
  2. Pittsburgh Steelers (12-4, AFC North Champs, First Round Bye)
  3. Baltimore Ravens (12-4, 2nd Place AFC North, Home Wildcard Game)
  4. NY Jets (11-5, 2nd Place AFC East, Home Wildcard Game)
  5. Indianapolis Colts (10-6, AFC South Champs but bad record, Visit New York in Wildcard Round)
  6. Kansas City Chiefs (10-6, AFC West Champs but bad record, Lost tie-breaker to Colts, Visit Baltimore in Wildcard Round)

And that is how it should line up. The getting into the playoffs is not the problem. It’s the way we’re lining up the teams once they’re there. A steller Ravens team should not have to go on the road to visit a barely-better-than-mediocre Chiefs team, but the Chiefs belong in the playoffs as the best team in their division, however weak a division it is… and it was pretty weak, this year. When will San Diego put together a full season!?

Likewise, the Seattle Seahawks won their division. It will take a team of NASA scientists and MIT mathematicians to figure out how they won a division with a losing record, but they did do it, so they belong in the tournament. They don’t, however, deserve to host the far superior (four wins superior, in fact) New Orleans team in a playoff game.

What say you, NFL Competition Overlords… I mean, Committee!?

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Movies I Saw From 2010

Posted on January 2, 2011 by Colin

This was not a particularly great movie-going year for me. I just realized that I haven’t seen a single movie in the thick of the Oscar discussion for the overall picture, director, and actor/actress awards. I’ve leant strongly toward comedies, which makes this seem a bit of a more base list than I’d like, but it’s still worth a recap.

Here’s a look at all of the movies first released in 2010 that I happened to see — either in theater or otherwise — with a rundown of my thoughts. Movies are listed in order by release date.

Leap Year PosterLeap Year
with Amy Adams, Matthew Goode, and Adam Scott (a personal favorite of mine)
Released to Theaters January 6. Seen on HBO in November.
In most ways, Leap Year, is an utterly predictable and fairly uninteresting romantic/road-trip comedy. Amy Adams is always wonderful to look at and plays the two traits of her role, well. Matthew Goode, who I know very little about, is perfectly great as the Irishman that wins her heart. It’s upsetting to see Adam Scott playing such a tool, here, but he’s good at it, and there’s the quick inclusion of Always Sunny’s Kaitlin Olsen. Anything that has any amount of Sweet Dee earns a few notches.

This was cutesy and well worth catching on cable. For its positives and generally vanilla lack of negatives, I give it 3 shamrocks of out 5.

The Crazies PosterThe Crazies
with Timothy Olyphant and Radha Mitchell
Released to Theaters February 26. Rented from Blockbuster (and subsequently returned late, which they still call me about) in August.
This being a George A. Romero production and a remake of a Romero classic, I had much much much (is that enough muches, yet?) higher hopes for this zombie-like-but-not-quite-zombie movie. There’s a contamination in the water source turning people in a podunk town all sorts of… get this… crazy. And who’s going to deal with them? The Sheriff, of course. If I’m being honest, this is a perfectly passable horror movie, with a handful of great scenes and sequences. Plus, there’s the whole “figure out if a member of our group is infected” thing, which is always a mind-bender… but this ain’t even a good zombie movie, let alone good movie.

Here’s to hoping they try harder on the next remake of Romero classic. I give The Crazies 2 out of 5 military containment officers.

Hot Tub Time Machine PosterHot Tub Time Machine
with John Cusack, Rob Corddry, Clark Duke, and Craig Robinson. Plus Chevy Chase!
Released to Theaters March 26. Seen in theater on March 26. And again on HBO recently.
Having now seen this “film” for a second time, I can be more objective, but I’ll start by saying this movie gave moviegoers what it advertised: lots of 80′s references (both direct and sneaky), lots of stupid 80′s jokes, and lots of crude, juvenile humor. And you know what? It’s freaking fun to watch. It’s not a great time-travel movie. It’s not a great 80′s movie, which I suppose it only sort-of is in the first place. On the surface, it makes you feel like John Cusack grabbed some friends to go to the well for some cash, but there’s enough percolating in here (like everything involving Crispin Glover, the ski patrol kids mistaking the guys for Russian spies, or the many 80′s movie homages) that make you think it’s a real effort. And it’s pretty funny. If you bring your most critical eye, you’ll find every flaw, but if you sit back and enjoy the ride, you’ll be cracking up all the way through Rob Corddry’s Motlue Crue video in the end credits.

It’s worth a spin. I give it 4 russian energy drinks out of a possible 5.

Toy Story 3 PosterToy Story 3
with the voice talents of Tom Hanks, Tim Allen, and many more including Kristen Schaal!
Released to the world June 18. Seen in Bakersfield, CA while moving across the country on June 29.
The verdict on this one seems like it’s been settled since before or perhaps immediately after it’s release. Every critic and every fan seems to think this is Pixar’s finest movie and possibly one of the finest animated feature films ever. While I don’t disagree that it’s a great movie, this is not the best animated film ever made. It’s probably not the best Pixar movie and it may not even be the best Toy Story movie. BUT, all of that said, this is a great movie that — in true Pixar fashion — has layers that work for the kids, layers that work for the parents, and layers that work for people like me that are neither of the before stated categories. Seeing this in Bakersfield for something like $6 a ticket was a sweet plus, too! There’s not much to say that hasn’t been said, and I’m sure you’re familiar with this Toy Story business, already. If you’ve seen 1 and 2, go see this one. If you haven’t seen the prequels, check those out and make it a point to see this quite great final chapter.

Give it a look as soon as you find yourself in the mood. 4 and 1/2 potato heads out of 5.

Knight and Day PosterKnight and Day
with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz
Released to theaters June 23. Seen in theater in Flagstaff, AZ on July 1.
This movie apparently did not do well in US box office, but recouped expenses and much more internationally. It’s a shame it didn’t get seen by more people, because this movie was freaking great. This movie broke my long-lasting dislike of Tom Cruise, though my disdain was crumbling a bit after Tropic Thunder. The stunts, the sights, the love story, the action elements, and generally everything except the old man chewing popcorn loudly near me were great about this movie. I don’t even typically like Cameron Diaz, but this movie was really fun and exciting. It’s well-written, well-acted, and has a few great twists to keep you going. If a certain Scott Pilgrim hadn’t hit theaters later in the summer, this would have easily been the “funnest” movie I saw in 2010.

I highly recommend it, regardless of your feelings for or against Tom Cruise. I give it 5 out of 5 motorcycle chases. Seriously.

I might as well get this out of the way. Despite my best intentions, I did miss the following summer biggies, which I’d fully hoped to see, during the busy July stretch. I hope to catch them, soon:

Back to the next (and last) movie from 2010 that I actually did see:

Scott Pilgrim vs the World PosterScott Pilgrim vs. the World
with Michael Cera, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Jason Schwartzman. Kieran Culkin steals many a scene, as well.
Released in theaters August 13. Seen in theaters on August 13. Then again a week later.
In know — Michael Cera’s probably worn out his welcome in your household, too. I mean, he’s always playing the same character and it’s rarely as likable as good ‘ol George Michael Bluth, am I right!? Not so, it turns out. This movie, done by the impeccable Edgar Wright of Hot Fuzz and Shawn of the Dead fame, is a re-imagining of a comic book series that actually draws direct inspiration from the panels on the comic pages. They did cram six full graphic novels into one movie, which leaves some plot lines unfinished and makes you feel it’s a big frayed around some edges, but the visuals, spot-on reproductions of the comic book characters, and killer soundtrack more than make up for it. Even if Michael Cera is making you queasy these days, you can look past some of his weird mannerisms and concentrate on the hilarious, witty, and fun interpretation of the absurd situations Scott Pilgrim gets into.

This movie didn’t get even make back its budget at the box office, which is a freakin’ shame. Grab the DVD or catch this on Netflix ASAP. I give it a full 5 out of 5 shipments from Amazon.ca. What’s the website for that, again?

–

Awesome. The funniest thing about this year may be that I didn’t see another movie after Scott Pilgrim. I’ve been cruising through the list and can’t find another one I did see. There were ones I’d hoped to see, but I suppose I just didn’t set my watch to walk up and pay $10 for the “privilege” of trying them out.

In September, The Town and Easy A both happened, which I intended to see. Let Me In, a fun-looking Americanization of Let the Right One In, dropped in October, along with The Social Network, which is getting all sorts of praise. I missed them all. While I’m at it, I’ll point out that I also wanted to see Nowhere Boy and Red, but couldn’t tell when they were coming out form their trailers. Into November, I missed Harry Potter 7, which is pretty radical for someone who has seen all Harry Potter movies within a week of their opening. Love and Other Drugs looked good, but got lost in the holiday season along with Black Swan and that new Disney farce. I will soon enough see The Fighter and True Grit, which came out in December, though probably not in that order. They both look spectacular.

So there you have it! A look back at a lackluster year of moviegoing from your’s truly.

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Engagement Photos

Posted on December 22, 2010 by Colin

Liz and I have, like, the best photographer, ever! We met her at University of Delaware for our engagement photo shoot (11 months after getting engaged! Who says we’re behind the ball!?) and she made us look seriously beautiful. Well, she didn’t have to try too hard to make Liz look stunning, but she did manage to make me look fabulous, as well.

Our photographer featured some of the photos from the session on her blog. Check it out.

Colin and Liz Engagement Photo at University of DelawareMakes me look forward to working more with Laurie at our wedding. Which is coming up in just over three months. Whew!

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